A Tribute to Gael Martin Conway

“Duct Tape and WD 40”

Gael Conway 

April 27, 1964 - March 7, 2019

I would like to share with you some images. Lightbulb, Grill, Truck Tractor, Duct Tape and WD 40.

First, think lightbulb.  Gael was the light upon the path that would show the way for others to go.  As Sam said of Gael, “He was light in the darkness to guide.”  I know this to be true.  I was able to get to know Gael this past year because I asked he and Kathy to help mentor a young couple.  This couple we connected with last August because they were living in a storage unit and were at that time eight months pregnant with a two year old in tow.  I knew enough about Gael to know that he was a man, as the song says, “acquainted with sorrows.”  He rose above the sorrows to make a wonderful life.  Asking he and Kathy to mentor this couple gave the couple a rare chance of a successful life.  I was able to appreciate his no nonsense compassion and straight talk.  

I am just saying, if you were on the receiving end of his counsel and not wanting to be, you may think he was arguing with you, he may say, “I’m not arguing I am explaining why I’m right.” Gael is a diamond, created from the coals of living.  Gael laughed hard and cried well.  He found just the words needed.  In his obit it was written of him, “Gael was a big Toys R Us kid and always said he was never going to grow up. He was always a Smart Alek and had an open and bright outlook on life. He wore his heart on his sleeve and was a people person but expected respect.” “Anytime Kathy would say "Oh my God" Gael would reply with his most noted quote "don't include me"!”

Is it true that Katlyn pushed Gael out of a raft in class IV whitewater? Maybe…  Is it true that Gail loved to blow things up especially on the 4^thof July? Definitely… Is it true that Gale would drive through a blizzard to go to a water park?  Always…  

Now I want you to think about grills, as in smoking and barbecuing.  Gael had a deep religious connection with God.  In the Old Testament, you will learn that the pleasing odor to God is fat burning.  God loves a good barbecue.  Gael loved a good barbecue.  God is really concerned with feeding people who are hungry.  Gael loved to fed hungry people.  Gael is just like God!  Gael cooked for the monthly Friday night meals at the church and for Wednesday night meals.  He would plan and scream for weeks about the menu.  Brisket.  Pulled Pork.  He would make so much food that the leftovers from one meal would feed everyone that came to the next.  This shirt-off-the-back giving to others was seen when he was honorably discharged from the Air National Guard for having fallen in the attempt to help a person at Angel Falls.  He was the angel that fell 50 feet.  He even drove himself to the hospital with a broken knee.  When it came to holiday time, the whole family always looked forward to his mystery meat at Christmas and Thanksgiving. 

            In the writings of Isaiah, we hear these words, 

Even youths will faint and be weary,
   and the young will fall exhausted;
but those who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength,
   they shall mount up with wings like eagles,

Gael through his cooking and helpful heart renewed people’s strength and restored their soul.

Now think with me about his Truck Tractor.  Gael was a self-employed truck driver for 36 years. He drove a tractor trailer most of his life and was awarded a million mile “no accident safe driving award” in July of 2018. Think of it as a metaphor that Gael could go the distance with his family.  Though a difficult time, Gael and his siblings made the most out of their life together.  I know that if you catch a catfish by hand it’s called “noodling”.  I don’t know what it’s called when you catch trout by hand. Lucky? They used filters from cigarette butt’s to make flies for fly fishing.  They decorated a Christmas tree with snicker bars to surprise their mom. They played cowboys and Indianans with a 22 and live shells.  And learned how to ride a cobbled horse.  It is written, “Gael had a tough childhood, but never backed down or gave up and grew to be a very loving, respectful father, husband, and friend to many. Very smart and ornery.”  “He never met a stranger, had a calming presence, was very supportive, and had a big shoulder to lean on.”

Tim McGraw sings in “Shotgun Rider”,

She said, Rodeo man, where are you going?
Don't you know that the life of a cowboy is no good alone?
If you tear down that fence of rusty barbed wire
Then I'll lay down beside you and be your shotgun rider[1]

            Kathy and Gael knew each other from work.  They connected over “covering a piece for transport to Arkansas.”  Gael kept telling his sister about this woman.  Gael got his hand smacked on their first date when was a wee too fresh.  They enjoyed eating food he cooked, go figure, or going out to eat.  In August of 2009, Gael wrote a marriage proposal by email timing the email to arrive when Kathy started her shift at work.  The emails went on and confessing his love and commitment to her.  When he returned from a trip to Florida, he returned with a ring and lunch.  They were married on December 15, 2009 at the Courthouse in Centerville Michigan.  Kathy says, “The greatest day in Gael's life was "when we married and became a family."  They were  spontaneous, protective, always connected, sending emoj’s and notes continually.  “He smoothed the road for me.”  Jonny Lang sings in "Bring Me Back Home":

Oh it ain't that house we live in

And it ain't that ride I'm fixin'

It's just you babe, that brings me back home

Kathy and kids, you brought Gael back home.  

I love the promise that Jesus makes to his disciples to prepare them for his own death.  Jesus tells them, ‘I will not leave you orphaned; I am coming to you. In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me; because I live, you also will live.”  The love that Gael has given, the love that Jesus gives, continues.  It’s not over.  The truck tractor keeps rollin’ on. 

Finally, think with be about Duct Tape and WD 40.  “If it moves and it shouldn’t – duct tape it. If it should and doesn’t – WD 40.” Here is the first rule of fatherhood and the first rule of being a husband: make the way easier for your kids and for your wife.  When you are home, you will never be more than a few inches away from his finger prints on things he made, fixed or made better.  Be a duct tape/WD 40 kind of dad and husband.  Gael liked to fix things.  He could also fix anything out of seemingly nothing.  He was a fixer.  “How can I help?”  He was a mechanic of more than cars.  Ozzy Osbourn in “Crazy Train” sings, 

Crazy, but that's how it goes

Millions of people living as foes

Maybe it's not too late

To learn how to love and forget how to hate[2]

Gael was all about learning and teaching how to love and forgetting how to hate.  In my last conversation with Gael, he was talking about people with which he disagreed. He waved his hand and said, “That’s ok, whatever they want to do or think, that’s ok for them.  It’s just not me.”  How much better would our country be today if more folks had that grace. Gael and his family characterize themselves as  having “love endless love; always doing for others.”

When you remember Gael, remember simple things that became extra-ordinary in his hands: Lightbulb, Grill, Truck Tractor, Duct Tape and WD 40.  You honor Gael most by living as he did.  In the end, be like God; be like Gael.  Cook a lot of food.  Feed hungry people.  Love without limit.  

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[1]Songwriters: Marv Green / Troy Verges / Hillary Lindsey Shotgun Rider lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc, Universal Music Publishing Group, BMG Rights Management

[2]Songwriters: O. Osbourne / R. Daisley / R. Rhodes Crazy Train lyrics © S.I.A.E. Direzione Generale, Blizzard Music Ltd., Kord Music, Blizzard Music Limited